From Subconscious to Conscious: The Language of The Body

Have you ever had a dream that was metaphorical? When I was in nursing school  I once had a dream that I was on a stage, leading a dog and pony out in front of an audience.  This is a dream that required very little interpretation. My subconscious was clearly telling me that some aspect of my life was literally akin to a dog and pony show.

If there is one thing I've learned in my recovery from CFS it's that the language of the body is not literal, precisely because the subconscious, the soul, doesn't have language. The soul communicates in dreams and metaphors, it's language is symbolic, and intuitive. Illness is not just in the body. It resides in and affects all aspects of ourselves, body, mind and soul. 

I knew I was finally recovering when I began to have vivid dreams of being on board a big ship that had run aground, and was stuck, swaying and tilting on it's side, wedged amongst the shoals in  dark and shallow waters. Slowly, through a series of dreams, the, the ship started to move. At first it began to right itself, backing  away from the danger of shallow waters, making its way into the deep ocean, and finally  sailing evenly into the bright sun and smooth waters. I had recovered. My subconscious was telling me I had "righted" myself, and set sail again, after being stuck and battered against the rocks. My body, realigned with my subconscious , was no longer stuck.

The metaphor for being stuck makes itself known in the biology of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Some physicians (Dr. Lam comes to mind), and many practitioners theorize that CFS/Adrenal Fatigue is caused by an autonomic nervous system that is "stuck" in overdrive.  The body/mind takes a huge "hit", and the nervous system is unable to switch into parasympathetic rest/relax mode. What many sufferers can't believe is that a nervous system disorder can make them so very, physically ill. I guess I'm here to say that it can!  I have even noticed that many people who suffer from CFS, get "stuck" in their illness. They are mired in symptoms, and their lives are on hold or  revolve around the "stuck" aspect of their illness. Everything changes, but they remain sick, stuck on the merry-go -round of searching for the right doctor, diet, supplement, treatment or research study. Moving without change becomes a way of life, so much like my big ship. Slowly swaying, but always stuck.

Since there are no available cures for CFS, the way to recovering my health was to listen to the multitude of debilitating symptoms that my body was sending me. How was I feeling in the moment? What was I doing? If I did something differently did the symptoms go away? And so it went, my symptoms gradually residing , my energy returning, feeling my body literally heal itself...and then the emotion of grief, the grand underlay, that thing I was blocking, that thing that I had no idea was there, came tumbling out and over me. A feeling I had blocked, that lay stuck in my body, that razed such  energetic havoc in my body, was freed, and once freed, felt,  and gradually dissipated.  I was made whole again. I had returned to Me. I should think that would work with just about any illness.